write you a song

I don’t know how to make lots of money
I got debts that I’m trying to pay
I can’t buy you nice things, like big diamond rings
But that don’t mean much anyway
I can’t give you the house you’ve been dreaming
If I could I would build it alone
I’d be out there all day, just hammering away
Make us a place of our own

I will write you a song
That’s how you’ll know that my love is still strong
I will write you a song
And you’ll know from this song that I just can’t go on without you

I don’t know that I’d make a good soldier
I don’t believe in being violent and cruel
I don’t know how to fight, but I’ll draw blood tonight
If somebody tries hurting you

I will write you a song
That’s how you’ll know that my love is still strong
I will write you a song
And you’ll know from this song that I just can’t go on without you

Now that it’s out on the table (it’s out on the table)
Both of us knew all along (knew all along)
I’ve got your loving and you’ve got my song

I don’t know how to make lots of money
I don’t know all the right things to do
I can’t say where we’ll go, but the one thing I know
Is how to be a good man to you
Until I die that’s what I’ll do

I will write you a song
That’s how you’ll know that my love is still strong
I will write you a song
And you’ll know from this song that I just can’t go on without
I will write you a song (I will write you a song)
That’s how you’ll know that my love is still strong (love is still strong)
I will write you a song
And you know from this song that I just can’t go on without you

seriously, i’m just waiting for pan to send me those photos so i can put it here. meanwhile, entertain yourselves with this video. think its awesome. :D

nosebleed -.,-

guess what? its a beautiful saturday afternoon and i’m staying at home with a nosebleed. oh what a life~

dont ask me what happen cos its the first ever nosebleed i’ve had in my entire 20 years of life. great. and it dosent help when i’m having flu as well. so yea i’m literally sneezing out blood. -.,- <— this is how i look with blood dripping out. though it was originally supposed to be nose hair. but i guess it could pass as blood too. -.,-

enough about nosebleeds.

recently i’ve been really into reading books written by Jodi Picoult. she’s an excellent author i’m telling you. i got to know about her through my little monster xuelin. and nineteen minutes is the first ever book i’ve read. well i’m currently on my third, change of heart, and i’ve also read my sister’s keeper. please people. even if you havent read a single complete book throughout your entire life, please give Jodi a try. its really good i tell you. once i start i cant stop. i know its cliche and some people are just not into fiction, but these are really worth reading. if you dont want to spend money buying them, you can always borrow it from me or from the library.

and why am i so into her books? cos what she’s writing are not typical thriller ghost whatever or chic books that talk about bimbo shit that dosent require brainpower when reading. its about using a typical situation that both you and i might face in our entire life span and twisting it into something that is both unexpected and yet chances of it really happening is not entirely impossible. well lets just say she has a way of reading your mind and instead giving you something that you will never expect. and even so, the unexpected conclusion is not something that you will deem impossible either, though you’ve never thought about that. and the next thing you know , you understanding that there’s so many possibilities of something and its impossible for you yourself to actually guess it. and slowly you’ll find yourself reading between the lines and anticipating yet another twist.

ok thats just me gushing on and on about my experience with her books. READ THEM PLEASE!

little fact about jes : likes the way high heels look but hates wearing them. >:D

excuses

ok i know its been eons since i last updated. but remember i’m not the only one who hasnt have the decency to keep this blog going even after saying we’ll try our best. ah. i can only say what do you guys expect of us? (:

well i guess i should talk about my job since that’s the excuse i gave for not updating. well 2 words, it sucked. ok correction 4 words, it sucked BIG TIME. well the pay sucks too. so dont think that i have at least that to console myself. anyway, 3 months have come and gone and i’m almost going to be jobless again soon. nowadays i’m just taking unpaid leaves ( not that any of the days i took off was paid ) because my migraine is acting up and my boss is kind enough to let me rest at home. the reason why my work sucks is solely due to one particular bitch who has the honour to prepare my work schedule. correct, the one who gives me things to do to make my wages worth. details about how she makes my life miserable shall be saved as a conversation with me when you have the chance. in other words, i’m too lazy to type it all out here.

another thing thats been happening would be the gigs i’ve had few weeks ago. the more significant one would be the one at the arena, clarke quay. well i would say its quite an experience since i’ve never participated in anything that large scaled before. hope more of such will come soon! (: thanks to those who came and supported.

during the course of the event ( the gig ), i’ve made some new friends. my bandmates. funny thing is, they are all younger than me. i know in this kind of things why the hell i’m thinking of age differences when other things matter more significantly. well beats me. just thought it was funny and i havent worked with pple younger than me in this area.

us

yep i know they dont look all that younger than me so why am i being such a pain the ass?!

well then since you guys now know that i’m currently in an active band, there’s no more excuses to miss my show dosent it? (:

well i shall end with this,

I woke up this morning feeling kind of blue
and I stumbled out of bed and
dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was a rose
and a note that said ‘Somebody Loves You’ 

– Corrinne May ( Angel in Disguised)
 

I LOVE YOU my angel in disguised.

slogging our asses off.

wah! been so long since either of us update this blog. we’ve been slogging our asses off in work/army that’s why. anyway, also don’t have much things to say. just to explain why we haven’t been diligently posting new and interesting posts. well, am planning to post a photolog soon to let pictures speak for themselves regarding what both of us have been doing.

till then, WE’LL BE SLOGGING OUR ASSES OFF. bye.

Etching Memories.

It’s the second day of work for jes already.

Job = Income = Money = Shiok

Yea, it sure beats having nothing to do at home with no means of income and slowly seeing all your money trickle away. I guess I will need to find a good-paying job soon after I ord in feb next year. Currently I’m going through a tough period, one that sees me in a state of near-broke man. There, that’s for not being money, no I should say thrifty-minded. Maybe i should start keeping tabs on my expenditure. And from there maybe I can work something out.

Actually the reason why the sorry state is because I just spent a significant bulk of my salary on my new camera. Still figuring how to take decent pics with it. Its really cool meddling with the manual functions of the camera. Exactly how I would like it to be. But guess need some time to get use to it.

Let’s see, my liking of photography started with some nonsense 2mp digital camera/recorder received as a freebie for signing something up(can’t remember which). Actually I can’t really say the camcorder got me started into photography, but at least its the first one that I put in considerable effort into, using it. The camcorder was really bad for taking photos. Alright, maybe I shouldn’t make a fuss outta it afterall its just a freebie, plus given the fact that back then mainstream digicam only had like 3,4 mp only. Heck, its not even a dedicated camera to begin with..

Fast forward 2 years later to end 2005, I got my hands on sony-ericsson k750i phone. Another 2mp-er. But it could take photos much better than the 2mp camcorder that I had previously. And its pretty amazing considering that its just a phone but it could take photos better than dedicated digicams then. Ok, those digicams that I’m referring to of course aren’t those top-end, state-of-the-art camera or what. Maybe dated, but by no means ancient, pns digicam.

It was the k750i that I realise my interest of photography. I was pretty satisfied with it. So much so that when I lost the phone after barely 2 months of using it, I replaced it with the exact same model again. From then on I didn’t change my phone all the way till I got enlisted last april and had no choice but to change it to a non-camera army phone. Even then, whenever I booked out I’ll still use my k750i. Only this year in june when I changed my army phone to nokia e51 before I finally retire my k750i, now proudly sitting at one corner of my room.

Next, during the earlier two overseas trip to Thailand and Taiwan this year, I brought my sis’ Sony cybershot T5 along. It’s a dedicated 5mp camera, though abit dated by now, it is still usable. Rather fun using it, and if you have got all the settings done correctly, you can churn out pretty decent pics. Too bad it wasn’t mine. That was when I realise I really need a camera of my own.

So enter Canon PowerShot SX110 IS,

Not a high-end camera definitely, but just by thinking about all the possible things that I can do with it is enough to excite me already woot!

___________________

Like what I said earlier on about keeping tabs on my expenditure, I can start keeping tabs on my life now.

hindsight

–noun

recognition of the realities, possibilities, or requirements of a situation, event, decision etc., after its occurrence.

i realised that i’m mainly blogging in hindsight. blogging about thoughts even though things might have happened a long time ago. interesting. blogging in hindsight signifies the importance of that particular event that had occurred. if not why would i bother to think so much about it and eventually blog it down?

anyway i’m just blogging this after the realisation of how my blog works. hindsight. cool. (:

friends

(: you know i’ve always wanted a large group of friends? clique you may call that. but sadly i never do. :s i have friends i don’t deny, but they always comes in 1 or 2 and thats all. for example my best jia, is one person from one category, then i’m close with serena and angie, and thats only 2 other. even with xuelin, parmes and wari, the BC, its only 3 other. i wanted more. i remembered i use to tell xuelin that i’ve always wanted a large group of friends to hang out with and i’m envious of her and her friends. she told me large groups also have their problems in itself being large and there are people who are closer inside the group too. clique within clique. well thats true i suppose. every circumstances has its pros and cons. but still, its nice to have a large group of friends to hang out with and be crazy with. (: i guess i’m reminiscing my MI days. i can safely say that during the time in MI, its my craziest and funnest school days and i never regret going there for first 3 months. phecda 2 (our OG) will always be remembered. (: and that is the only time where i get to belong to a large group of people. and i really enjoyed that. people coming together to have fun and make friends. how nice. (:

pan also has a large group of friends which i’m extremely jealous about. 7 of them in total in the group and the siaos their name. those pictures i saw and whatever pan told me about what they do and stuffs really makes me feel so envious. and my naivety allows me to think that i can join them without any considerations. sadly, they are too comfortable with one another and i can’t bear to interrupt their comfort zone and barge in obliviously. :x well like pan say, that will have to wait.

anyway today i’ve experienced a really nice feeling of friends. going out with pan, simon and shuling brings me back to the old days at MI where i have a group of friends to share laughter with. (: though they might not be reading this, i really thank them for being such nice people and company. more of such days please! (:

on the serious note, pan has made me realise something about myself today. that i’ve changed. i’ve changed from the happy and colourful jes with the orange specs to the emo and pessimistic and bitter jes and now i’m slowly changing back to the happy pill that i was. that really set me thinking and i feel kind of frightened that these things actually happened without me noticing it. as for pan, i think its quite unbearable and maybe you might feel helpless that you were actually watching me change and yet knowing there was nothing you could do. but i really appreciate that you are concerned and now letting me know all these. not to worry, the bad days are long gone and there’s nothing to hold me back now. i can already feel myself being released and revert back bit by bit. (: thanks for being a real friend (and of course more than that).

movie

today i woke up at 1030 with a sudden craving for junkfood..

in case you’re about to accuse me of writing in that mundane boring style that jes has sworn upon her life that she wouldn’t practise, hold your tongue! i was only kidding. (:

don’t you think life’s like a movie? i wouldn’t say my life has been so eventful but thinking about it, even though my life’s movie might not appeal to the mass, it does have its ups and downs and jes has been through so many different phases of her life and it somehow resembles a movie, scene after scene. except for the fact that it has to be fast forwarded, parts of it seems like a rough draft of a movie. everyone has a movie life i guess. like i’ve said, though it might not appeal to the mass but its everyone’s little movie that has built up over the years of their existence. the colours of their individual lives. it might also resemble a book. thats why you get memoirs and stuffs.

the bottom line is EVERYONE IS SPECIAL. and EVERYONE IS THE LEAD ACTOR/ACTRESS of their own private movie. (: (: (: we’re all uniquely different. i remembered huda told me once,

“what makes you different, makes you beautiful.”

Pan’s First.

Alright, so jes did an intro to this blog in the previous entry. Yup, this blog shall be special. It probably won’t has your usual “oh today I woke up at 10.30 and had this sudden craving of snacking on junk food”, “arh.. met up with Calbee just now and went over to the S11 to eat” or “I went to see a doctor this afternoon because I had been eating too much junkfood” that kinda blog posts.

 

 

But but, notice I used probably instead of being definite on that previous paragraph?

 

 

Cos knowing myself, I don’t think I can be so absolute on anything. So yea maybe someday I might just want to do an entry based on my daily routines like how I suddenly wake up one day and decide to satisfy my craving for junkfood and then having to see a doctor afterwards for eating too much of it.. *If that really happens, paiseh jes for creating such dry entries :X. But I’ll try to keep them to a minimum because its not just my blog anymore. Its jes and pan’s blog. :)*

 

 

I like the idea of having a blog because I feel that certain things and moments of life are too precious to be unrecorded. Our memories do fail. So just in case it really does happen, at least those recorded down here will not be forgotten. My previous blog somewhat failed because I lacked the commitment to do frequent updates to it. But like what jes said, with one extra helper, everything is only gonna be easier. Speaking of which, once I get hold of a new camera, hopefully I’ll be doing more photo-posts. Afterall, a picture speaks a thousand words and I can practice my lesser-than-amateur photography skills too.

 

 

Hmm I guess that’s about it for my first post here as thepanwashed. More good years ahead with thewhitewashed !

 

 

To thewhitewashed : You’re welcome man, really appreciate you for taking the effort to start this blog. And yea! Let’s keep this blog going strong and healthy alright? Anything that you want to say, you can say it to my ears directly. They’re always on alert for you lol. And the rest of the world don’t have to know :P